Go
by MaryRussellgrl
Summary: Sara and Grissom are married and going through a lot of things at work and in their private life, but their love stays strong. (Terrible summary...Oh well)


Grissom stirred the cream in his coffee at the counter of his house seeing me come in ready for work. I moved past him to get some coffee then I leaned against the counter watching him turn looking at me.

"What's on for the shift?" He asked

"Well I need to run prints off that hammer and….look at the tires off the truck." I said

"What else?"

"What do you mean?" I asked

"You said you would help me with that experiment."

I smiled as he looked at me.

"Playing a dead body at the crime scene."

"Yes, that is very important." He said

"Can't you just bring everything in at the lab?"

"No, I need the exact surroundings."

I set down my cup on the counter then I put my arms around his neck.

"As I recall last time you got carried away."

"I won't this time." He said, kissing me. I moved back smiling letting him go.

I worked on what I needed to do then Grissom took me to this house along a residential street. We parked walking up the sidewalk seeing the cops standing guard at the door waiting for us. We went in going up the stairs to the main bedroom. The mattress was still there with blood on one side. Grissom motioned me to lay on the clean side.

"Close your eyes." He said

"You're not doing anything weird are you?" I asked

"Sara." He said

I sighed closing them feeling him move my hands down on either side of my body.

"She was sleeping like this and he comes in holding a cord from the vacuum." He said, getting out a cord from his bag.

"Did he knock her out?" I asked

"Sara, you're supposed to be sleeping. No talking." He said, thinking.

I shook my head waiting.

"He must have hesitated then he climbed over her quickly."

I felt him climb on top of me straddling my stomach.

"Problem, if he did that she would have felt him and struggled."

"Sara, no talking."

I groaned feeling him climb off me.

"If he didn't do that then he must have done this." He said, covering my mouth then he put the cord around my neck. "Then again we run into the problem of her moving her arms about."

My cell phone went off and Grissom grabbed it looking at the caller. I sat up watching him answer the phone.

"Greg, we are busy right now. What do you need?"

He looked at me.

"Sara, did you get any prints off the hammer?"

"No." I said

"No, she did not."

He listened then hung up. I grabbed the phone putting it away then I laid back closing my eyes.

"He must have stunned her then strangled her. That makes sense." He said, rubbing his chin. "The question is what he hit her with."

I heard him walk around the room looking at things. I laid back letting myself relax. Grissom took out some pictures of the crime scene looking at them then the bed.

"He hit her with his fist. Then he covered her mouth and tied the cord to her neck." He said, walking over putting the photos over my legs wrapping the cord around my neck. "Yes, that sounds plausible. What do you think?"

When I didn't answer he looked at me.

"Sara, what do you think?"

"I'm sleeping."

"Well wake up and tell me what you think." He said

I opened my eyes looking at him.

"I think you are brilliant and right about the event."

He gave me a look as I chuckled getting up. He leaned over kissing me then walked over to the case putting his pictures and cord away.

"You're biased." He said

"I know." I said

He stretched picking up his case walking with me outside to the car. He stopped thinking as I turned watching him.

"What's wrong?"

"Something does not feel right."

"It sounded okay to me."

"No, it's not that. When we came down the stairs…..here take this and put it in the car." He said, handing me the case.

"Where are you going?"

"I'll be right back." He said, walking back to the house. A cop went in with him as I walked to the car putting his case in the trunk. I shut the trunk seeing a man peeking at me from the side of the car facing the street. I jumped putting my hand to my gun as I looked at him.

"Can I help you?" I asked

"You a cop?"

"No, I am with the crime lab."

He looked over at the house then at me.

"I knew the lady that lived there."

"Are you a relation?"

"No, just a friend."

"What do you want with us?"

"Do you have a suspect?" He asked, uneasy.

"I can't talk about that."

Grissom and the cop came out walking over to where I was he saw the man I was looking at.

"May I help you?"

The man shook his head walking away quickly.

"That was weird." I said

"What did he want?" Grissom asked, looking at me.

"He wanted to know if we have a suspect." I said

"Hmm."

I moved in bed touching Grissom as he slept beside me. Putting my arm around his waist settling against his back. He moved looking at the clock on his side then closing his eyes laying his head down.

I moved when he touched my fingers to lay on my side. He moved coming up behind me putting his arm around my waist kissing my neck.

"Time to work." He said

I didn't move as I pretended to sleep.

"Sara?"

He rested his chin on my shoulder looking down at my down at my expressionless face. I breathed slowly feeling his eyes.

"Sara."

He pulled me to my back giving me a heart stopping wake up kiss. He moved back watching me smile looking up at him.

"I like waking up that way." I said

"I knew you were awake, Miss. Sidle."

"Grissom." I said, correcting him.

"Grissom." He said, smiling down at me.

"Since we have been married for two weeks I think we should cover some issues that have come up. Do you have any?"

"Only one."

"What is that?" I asked, touching his cheek with my fingers.

"You have cold feet."

"You never complained before."

"That is because I love everything about you, but it does give me a shock every time I lay down."

"My feet are a problem?"

"Your feet are beautiful, but they are very cold and you like to tangle them in my legs."

"Okay, I will wear socks."

He kissed me slowly.

"My turn." I said

"What faults do I have?"

I chuckled looking at him.

"When you are asleep you like to cuddle me from behind."

"You don't like cuddling?"

"I love it, but when you do you tend to snore in my ear."

"I'll make a mental note not to snore in your ear."

"Thank you."

"Anything else?"

"No."

"Good, we will work on what we have." He said

His cell phone went off and we both groaned. He reached for it as I got out of bed walking to the bathroom looking back watching him enjoy the view of my backside.

Grissom walked ahead of me to the building as I stayed behind seeing that strange man standing by the corner of the building looking at me. Grissom turned looking at me.

"Sara, what's wrong?"

I recovered looking at him then I looked back at the man.

"I'll be right back." I said, walking over. Grissom watched me go confused then he saw the man that was by the vehicle the other day. He watched me talk to the man who nervously looked in Grissom's direction.

"Is he a cop?" He asked

I looked back at Grissom then at the man.

"No, he's not. What can I do for you?"

The man fidgeted reaching into his pocket to hand me a photo. I took it seeing the female victim and her family sitting by a fireplace with ugly sweaters on smiling. I looked at him as he looked down at the picture.

"Where did you get this?" I asked

"She gave it to me."

"Why?" I asked

Grissom walked over slowly careful not to spook the man.

"We were friends, good friends. She told me everything."

"What is your name?" Grissom asked

The man backed up as I reached over touching his arm. He looked at me coming back.

"Gibson." He said

"Mr. Gibson, would you mind coming into the building and we can talk more about this." Grissom asked

"If she comes then I will." The man said

"That's fine." I said, nodding looking at Grissom.

We walked with Gibson to the building in silence. I walked with him to the interrogation room as Grissom followed calling Brass.

Gibson looked around the room sitting carefully into the chair as I put the photo down in front of him sitting across the table. Grissom walked in with Brass. The man got up backing up as he looked at Brass.

"Is he a cop?!"

"I am Captain Jim Brass."

"No….I won't talk if he is here!"

"Mr. Gibson, I assure you that…"

"No, no cops!"

Brass looked at Grissom and I then he looked at Gibson. I got up walking over to the frightened man.

"We are not going to hurt you. We just want to talk." I said

He looked at me then the men standing by the table.

"I have some dogs at my home. They need someone to care for them."

"You can when you go home." I said "We are not arresting you."

The man looked deeply into my eyes then he put his arm around my neck pulling me closer to him.

"I killed her and her family." He whispered

"Why?" I asked

Grissom stepped forwards only to be stopped by Brass.

"I was trying to save her from her husband. I told her to leave him, but she only shook her head. Now…..now I can save you!"

I shook seeing the familiar look that I had seen in Adam Trent and a few other people. This man had nothing to lose.

"Get him off me!" I shouted

Brass and Grissom ran over as Gibson got out a knife putting it to my neck as he yanked me around to see them.

"Let her go!" Brass said, raising one hand as he touched his gun at his side. Grissom froze looking at me then at Gibson worried.

"I told you no cops!" He shouted

"Put the knife down! You know you won't get out of the building. Why not give up and then we can talk calmly." Brass said

"Tell them." He said, in my ear. "Tell them!"

"He killed them!" I said, winching as he pressed the blade against my neck.

At that moment I started to relive the time I was with Adam Trent in the nurse's station. The feeling's came back. Trembling, I closed my eyes waiting for the end to come. Grissom could see something was happening with me. He knew he had to think about a plan on how to stop this.

"I want to get out of here now!" Gibson shouted

"You're not getting out of here!" Brass said

"You tell them to move!" He said, against my ear. I gasped as he dug the knife deeper into my skin causing blood to come down my neck.

"Move!" I shouted

Grissom looked at Brass as he motioned them to move back. Gibson slid past them against the wall holding me close to him.

"Open the door!" He ordered, looking at Grissom.

Grissom walked over opening the door. Gibson eased out slowly keeping his eyes on the two men. We went out into the hallway seeing it was clear. Brass got on his radio as Grissom went out watching us go down the hallway against the wall. I winched as the knife moved on my skin.

"Gibson…..you don't have to…..do this." I said

"I have no choice!" He said

"Yes…you do." I said

"Quiet!" He said, looking around the corner seeing lab workers walking around. He yanked me around the corner seeing people looking out from the window of their labs. Grissom and Brass walked slowly along making Gibson paranoid. I swallowed thinking that I could die soon. I turned my head looking over at Grissom pleading mentally with him to help me. A couple police stood around the corner pointing their guns at us. Gibson stopped looking at them. Grissom and Brass stopped watching Gibson look around for some escape. He saw Grissom's office was unlocked and we went in closing the door. I fell to the floor touching my neck as he went around the room closing the blinds.

"We'll stay in here." He said, pacing. I crawled over to the couch climbing up seeing shadows outside.

"You won't escape. They will kill you!" I said

"If they do then I won't be the only one." He said

He looked at me as I looked at him.

"You're really going to kill me?"

"I never wanted to do this."

I looked down at my wedding ring as he looked outside then he looked at me. The office phone started to ring and Gibson walked over taking it.

"Yes?" He said

I stood watching him listen. He looked at me then he looked down.

"I want a ride out of here." He said

He listened not noticing me walking to the door looking out seeing police and Grissom talking with Catherine. I looked back at Gibson as I slowly unlocked the door. He looked over at me dropping the phone he ran over grabbing me. The people in the hallway looked over at the door hearing a struggle. Gibson threw me to the floor hitting me hard in the face knocking me out. He breathed in and out fast getting up making his way to the phone.

"What happened was that this woman in here tried to escape!" He said

He looked over at me lying on my back still.

"You can't talk to her! Get me a car!"

He hung up sighing walking over to the door seeing Brass talking to Grissom and Catherine. Gibson paced holding his knife in his hand rubbing his face. He looked down at me then he went and sat in Grissoms desk chair thinking. A knock at the door made him stand. He walked over to the door looking out seeing Grissom motioning to let him in.

"What do you want?" Gibson asked

"I want in." Grissom said

"No!"

"Let me in Gibson."

He sighed rubbing his mouth on his hand. He looked over at me on the floor still then he slowly unlocked the door allowing him in. Grissom opened the door slowly seeing me on his office floor. Gibson pulled him in locking the door up. Grissom looked at him.

"Go sit on the couch and keep quiet." He said

Grissom nodded walking over stopping to kneel down to me.

"Leave her alone!" Gibson said

"She's bleeding I want to fix her cut." Grissom said

Gibson sighed looking at me then at Grissom.

"Do it."

I was gently lifted off the floor and put on the couch then Grissom went and got his first aid kit walking over to sit and clean the cut on my neck. He opened a bottle of peroxide getting some cotton as he looked over at Gibson pacing. As he dabbed my neck I moved slowly opening my eyes seeing Grissom.

"Grissom?" I said

"Ssh." He said, motioning to Gibson.

I looked over at the pacing man then at Grissom.

"Are you okay?" He whispered

"I think so."

He nodded putting a bandage over my neck. I touched his hand as he looked at me.

"I love you." I whispered

"I love you." He said, very quietly.

Gibson walked over seeing I was looking at him. I removed my hand from Grissoms watching the man look between us.

"You….like each other don't you?" He said

"We do." Grissom said

"Just like I liked her."

"No, not like you. I would never kill her because she didn't listen to me." Grissom said

Gibson looked at Grissom. I sat up slowly staring at the man.

"You think I did that because she would not listen to me?"

"Yes, I do."

"You don't know anything!" He said, pointing his knife at Grissom. I moved closer to Grissom putting my arms around him to protect him. Gibson looked at me then him starting to smile then he walked away.

"What are we going to do?" I asked

"Brass is working on something." He said

Minutes seemed like hours as we waited. Gibson sat next to the door on the floor as Grissom and I sat on the couch. My head was throbbing from where Gibson hit me.

"Let me ask you something. What if I let you go right now?" He asked

"We would still take you into custody." Grissom said

Gibson sighed looked up at the ceiling.

"I never wanted to hurt anyone. I just…..wanted to stop all the violence that was happening in that house." He said "She came to me with her kids one day. Crying with bruises and blood on her body. She begged me to take the kids so she could talk to her husband."

"What happened?" Grissom asked

"What normally does, she came back taking the kids telling me he apologized promising never to do that again."

"Did she call the police?"

"Yes, several times, but nothing was ever done."

"So you decided enough was enough?"

"I went over to their house after hearing yelling and screaming. I didn't have a plan. The lights were off so I came through a window."

"You ran into the husband."

"Yeah, I stabbed him three times. He tried to do the same to me, but I was stronger. When I finished him I went up the stairs seeing the vacuum in the hallway. I took the cord and went to every room starting with the kids."

"You killed them?" I asked, glaring at him.

"I like kids." He said, smiling. "To live in a home and see what they saw. I had to do it. I came into her bedroom seeing her sleeping on the bed. She looked like an angel. She started to wake up and when she saw me she screamed. I had to hit her. She fell back on the bed stunned and I climbed over her taking the cord and tightening it around her neck."

"You were in love with her?" Grissom asked

"Yes, I was." Gibson said

I felt sick inside as he looked at us. Putting my hand over head as I stood.

"Sara, what's wrong?" Grissom asked, standing touching my back.

"I….feel sick!" I said, running over to Grissom's trash can throwing up. Gibson stood looking at me.

Grissom grabbed his phone as it started to ring.

"Grissom." He said, looking at Gibson. "We are fine for now."

Gibson walked over grabbing the phone.

"I am letting them go now." He said

I leaned on the desk wiping my mouth with a sleeve. Gibson gave to phone back to Grissom then he went to door. He looked at us unlocking the door.

"Take her and go."

I looked at Grissom as he looked at me motioning me to come with him. We walked out as he opened the door hiding behind it. Brass and his men waited. The door closed behind us locking again. I looked at Grissom who pulled me with him out of the way.

We went to the locker room when he put some ice in a towel on my temple. Brass came in looking grave.

"Did you get him?" I asked

"He is on his way to the hospital. He stabbed himself in the stomach."

"What are his chances?" Grissom asked

"Not good."

I sighed looking down. We got news at Gibson died and the case was closed. I sat on the couch thinking as Grissom walked in with our take out. He sat down seeing that I was distracted. He took my hand making me look at him.

"Where were you?" He asked

"I was just thinking about Gibson."

He squeezed my hand then opened the containers.

A month later Greg pushed me later as I laughed as he told a funny story in the break room. Catherine walked in seeing us.

"Greg, I need you to go help Grissom."

"I can go." I said

"No, he needs Greg." She said, smiling.

Greg got her meaning and groaned.

"Great, I wonder what part of my body will get a rash."

"You might have to leave a stool sample." I said

"I forgot about that." He said, walking out.

I laughed watching him go slowly down the hallway. Grissom stood at his desk as I walked in an hour later putting my arms around his waist laying my head on his back.

"Ready to go home?" I asked

When he didn't answer I moved my head seeing he was looking at a letter. I looked at the letter seeing the word sabbatical on it. I moved over grabbing the letter looking at it. Grissom watched me look at him with wide eyes.

"You're leaving?"

"I was offered to do a lecture." He said, nodding.

I thrust the letter at him walking to the door.

"Sara." He said, walking over grabbing me by the arms. "I was going to tell you after work."

"You don't change do you?"

"What do you mean?" He asked, watching me shake my head.

"You're still the same old Grissom who keeps news secret until the last moment."

"Sara, I told you I was going to tell you."

I left upset leaving him to look where I had been standing upset over my outburst. He came home as I had left right after shift. He came in the bedroom seeing me sitting on the bed on his side in my pajamas looking down.

"Sara, I want to talk about this." He said

I stood looking at him.

"I don't." I said

"We need to talk. " He said

I looked at his shirt then I looked at him.

"No we don't." I said, reaching over touching his shirt undoing the buttons. He looked down at my hands working his shirt. "I didn't mean to be angry. It's okay."

I stepped closer opening his shirt more kissing his skin.

"I think we should still talk about it."

"No, I want you to go." I said, looking at him.

"Honey, I know when your upset." He said

I sighed putting my hand in his pulling him to the bed where he sat down. I kissed him slowly then pushed him back so he leaned on his arms.

"I am fine." I said, undoing his belt. He watched me try to straddle him, but he pushed me back and I sighed.

"Then what is this?"

"This is me trying to seduce my husband." I said "He is not going to get lucky unless he stops wanting to talk."

"I don't want to do this."

"Fine!" I said, going out into the living room sitting on the couch flipping on the TV. He came out buttoning his shirt looking at me.

"Sara, I love you, but your anger needs to be dealt with."

I threw the remote on the couch standing looking at him.

"Okay let's deal with it! You are leaving on a sabbatical for I think three months!"

"True."

"You don't see anything wrong with that?"

"I won't go if this causes you a problem."

"Then you blame me."

"No, no I would not blame you."

I sighed pacing.

"Three months will go by fast. We can call each other and text." He said

"We just married and you're leaving me." I said

"Honey, I would never leave you." He said, walking over kissing my head. "I promise I will be back."

"I know." I said, taking his hand. "You need to go."

"Yes." He said "Now, let's continue your seducing in the bedroom."

"Ah, I am really tired and would just like to sleep."

"All right." He said

I walked past him not looking at him. He watched me go knowing I was still upset. The next week he was ready to go. I kissed him by his car as I was going to work and he was headed to the airport.

"You better go." I said, letting him move back.

He kissed me again touching my face then moved back looking me over before going to his car leaving. I sadly walked to mine missing him already. The days went by and he did call me when he could.

A week later Warrick ran into the house after I yelled one night. He came in seeing me holding my lower stomach stumbling towards him.

"Sara!" He said, catching me as I fell against him. He moved my hand seeing blood squirting out from a wound. I started to convulse as he dialed for 911.

Grissom stood before fifty students behind a podium talking about the art of being a CSI when a woman in a suit came running in to him. He put a hand over the microphone to listen to the woman.

"I got a call from a Catherine Willows. She said to tell you that your wife is in critical condition after a man stabbed her at a crime scene."

Grissom looked at her in surprise then he looked at the eyes of the class looking at him around the room.

"Ah….due to a personal emergency I will have to dismiss early." He said, then he grabbed his brief case and ran outside with the woman.

Catherine was standing outside the hospital grabbing her phone when it went off.

"Willows!" She said, sighing rubbing her head.

"Cath its Gil."

"I am glad you called."

"Tell me how she is." He asked, walking down the hallway.

"They lost her once in the ambulance then again a few minutes ago."

Grissom stopped terrified inside.

"They stabilized her and asked that you be here."

"I am coming."

"Good."

He hung up walking quickly to the dean's office. Catherine went back in scared. The nurse came out asking if my husband was coming. A few hours later he ran in seeing a very tired looking Catherine standing by the front desk looking at him with tears in her eyes.

"Has something happened?" He asked

"They ran into her room again and have not said anything." She said

"They will to me." He said, walking over to the doors looking through the windows. A Doctor came out as Catherine stood from her chair motioning to him that Grissom was here. Grissom stood walking over the man.

"How is my wife?"

"Stabilized again. We lost her a third time, but we were able to bring her back."

"Good, what are her chances?" Grissom asked

"Right now okay. If she goes again we may not be able to get her back. She's lost a lot of blood, but we are doing everything we can do."

"Thank you. Can I see her?"

"Yes, follow me."

Grissom hugged Catherine promising to call her then he followed the Doctor down the hallway to my room. The Doctor opened the door quietly as Grissom came in seeing I was lying in bed very pale almost gray looking with a heart monitor and wires everywhere.

"I will leave you alone." The Doctor whispered

"Thank you." Grissom said

The man patted his arm leaving. Grissom walked over looking at my chalky skin. He gently touched my hand feeling it was cool.

"I'm here Sara. You're safe."

Inside he prayed that I would continue to stabilize. He sat in a chair undoing his red tie rubbing my hand. He slept in the chair all night. In the morning it was gray outside raining when I slowly opened my eyes hearing beeping. Blinking slowly I heard the door open and a woman standing over me.

"Mrs. Grissom can you hear me?" She asked, checking my eyes. "Can you tell me your name?"

Grissom woke seeing the woman leaning over me. He stood looking at her.

"Something wrong?"

I moved my head looking over at him.

"Sara, you're awake!" He said, taking my hand.

"She seems to recognize you that is great. I'll get the doctor."

Grissom leaned over kissing my head.

"Honey, I am so glad you are awake."

He moved back looking at me. I closed my eyes sleeping again. He touched my hair sighing. I healed quickly after that and was allowed home after a few weeks. Grissom walked me inside slowly helping me into the bedroom. He laid me down pulling my shoes off as he put the blankets up against my chest.

"Hungry?" He asked

I shook my head closing my eyes. He touched my head concerned then walked out of the room. I slept for hours finally walking out slowly seeing him get up from his desk walking over.

"What are you doing?" I asked

"Just paying the bills. You okay?"

"Yeah." I said

He tried to put his arms around me, but I stopped him swallowing.

"I just need some room." I said

"Okay." He said, moving back.

I looked around breathing deeper.

"This room is closing in!" I said

"Sit down." He said, taking me by the arms leading me to the couch. "You're having a panic attack."

I put my hand to my chest breathing in and out harder feeling him rub my back saying soothing things to me. I finally got my breathing down to a calmer state feeling him pull me against him as he moved back.

"I love you Sara." He said

I closed my eyes letting him run a hand through my curled hair.

"What was it like Sara?" He asked

"What?"

"To die."

I opened my eyes looking down at his shirt.

"I don't remember." I said

We said nothing more as we just held each other. A month later I walked up to a dark house following Grissom. Stopping I looked up at it seeing it was very similar to the one I got shot in. Grissom turned seeing me.

"Sara, what are you doing?"

I looked at him then the house.

"I can't go in there." I said

He walked over watching me step back.

"The scene is in the house.

"It looks like the house I was in."

"It's not the same house and I will be with you so nothing will happen."

I breathed in and out fast looking at the house feeling his reassuring touch.

"All right." I said

He let me go first. I entered the house looking around seeing a policeman standing guard inside the front door.

"Okay, why don't you take the upstairs and I will be down here." He said

"Upstairs?" I asked

"You're safe here." He said "I can have a policeman take you up."

I nodded letting him go get one for me. When one came in I let him go up first. He checked every room and then nodded to me before standing at the door as I walked around feeling safe. Grissom knew that I needed to talk to someone about this and soon.

Back at the lab we worked up to the end of shift. Grissom watched me sit down on his office couch closing my eyes as I put my head back to rest.

"Sara, I want you to see a counselor."

I looked at him about to argue.

"I don't care if you refuse, you are going." He said

I went to see the counselor the next week. Grissom looked up as I walked into the lab room he was working in.

"How did it go?" He asked

"Fine." I said, starting to work. He glanced at me before working again.

After shift we went home. Grissom came into the bedroom seeing me undressing to change into something more comfortable. He smiled walking over kissing my neck. I jumped away looking at him.

"What's wrong?" He asked

"I don't want to be touched." I said

"Why not?"

"Please just keep away from me!" I said, running into the bathroom. He sighed sitting on the bed looking at the closed bathroom door. I sat on the toilet seat shaking.

He kept his distance from me for a few weeks. I came home walking over to see him lying on the couch sleeping with a magazine on his stomach. I stared at him thinking how cute he looked. I slowly slid over him causing him to wake seeing me.

"Hello." I said

"You okay?" He asked

"I am now." I said, leaning down kissing him. He kissed me back then moved back to look at me. "Gris, I am sorry for the way I have been."

"It's all right." He said, touching my cheek.

"I don't know why you put up with me." I said

He smiled faintly moving my hair back.

"I think I am blind to your faults." He said

"So where do we go from here?" I asked

He moved me till he was on top and I was on the bottom. He threw his magazine on the floor kissing me.

"I think we start here." He said

"Good." I said

He kissed me again moving his hand along my leg. I kept my eyes closed enjoying his touch.

A week later he was coming out of court as his phone went off. I smiled waiting for him to answer as Nick and I drove to a scene.

"Grissom." He said, obliviously to distracted to look at the ID on his phone.

"Do you want to sleep with me?" I asked, looking over at Nick as he laughed quietly.

Grissom stopped walking in the hallway.

"Who is this?"

"Your wife." I said

He sighed walking again.

"Sara, that was inappropriate."

"It was a joke." I said

"I don't care. What do you need?"

"Are you coming home on time?" I asked

"I don't know." He said

"Is the trial not going well?" I asked

"You could say that. Where are you?"

"On my way with Nick to a scene."

"Becareful."

"You know me." I said

"Sara, I am serious."

"Me to."

I hung up sighing looking at the road.

"He sounds like he is angry." Nick said

"He is."

"Case must not be going well."

"Yeah." I said

We went to work on the scene. Grissom rubbed his head as he came home. I sang in the kitchen as I stirred the spaghetti in the boiling water on the stove. Grissom came in stopping seeing I was in one of his work shirts with no pants. I danced in place singing a song he didn't recognize. I looked over at him smiling.

"I have dinner almost ready." I said

I turned seeing he was standing in place looking at my attire. I looked down at myself then at him.

"Do you like my outfit?"

"Why are you dressed like that?" He asked

"I thought you would approve." I said, unsure of his mood. "How did it go?"

"Fine."

I walked over to kiss him, but he moved away going to the living room. I walked out seeing him disappear into the bedroom.

I came in laying across the bed looking at him taking his suit off.

"You're in a mood." I said

He looked at me taking his tie off.

"I suppose I am." He said

"What's wrong?" I asked

He walked over sitting on the bed.

"It was a hung jury." He said

"Oh."

"Now it could lead to a guilty man being set free."

"You did your best."

"That's not the point. This man killed two people. The evidence was there and now it doesn't matter!"

I sat up behind him touching his back.

"When this happens I just question the entire legal system."

"You told me that legal system is not perfect." I said

He nodded looking down.

"Come have dinner." I said

"I'm not hungry." He said, getting up. I watched him go then I got up leaving the room.

He laid in bed closing his eyes after he changed. I came back in crawling over him to lay down looking at him. I moved my hand over his chest.

"Sara, what am I doing?" He asked

"What do you mean?"

"I am thinking of quitting and doing research." He said

I sat up looking down at him in shock.

"You can't quit!"

"Sara, it's time."

"I said no!" I said

He sat up looking at me.

"Honey, you know that I have wanted to go and do research someplace like….Paris. I can do it now."

"What about me?"

"You can come and we can get a house."

"I can't leave! The lab needs me….us!"

"Sara, I need a rest. Please try to understand."

I got out bed walking around the bed staring at him.

"When would you leave?"

"I don't know."

I folded my arms over my chest.

"This is great. I get you back from the sabbatical and now you want to leave me again."

He stared at me in silence.

"I can't stop you, but I have to stay here."

"Sara…I."

"Save it." I said, leaving.

He sighed laying back down on the bed. He came out of the bedroom later going to the spare room where I was. I stared at the lit window playing with my ring hearing him come in laying down beside me. His arms went around me.

"Sara, I know you are upset. This is a lot to handle, but you must understand that I am at this age and while I am basically middle-aged I want to devote my life to research while I can."

I said nothing as he waited.

"You want me to be happy don't you?" He asked

I sighed closing my eyes.

"I do want you to be happy."

He kissed my head settling down. I felt alone and depressed over his crazy decision. The next day he was still talking about leaving. I just nodded as he talked about the changes going to happen. All the while he was forgetting me. He told Ecklie the plans he had and after coming out he seemed almost relieved about moving on to something new.

I silently watched him at work then once I got home I would watch him walk around the house talking on his phone to someone in French. Boxes appeared at the house as he packed then after he shipped the boxes he noticed me. I felt him put his arms around me as I stood by the stove stirring soup from a can.

"All packed?" I asked

"I think so." He said, kissing my neck. "Soup?"

"Yeah." I said, looking down at the pot.

"George said the place I will be living in is nice. It has a courtyard near a café."

I nodded slowly.

"Sara?" He said, turning me around to look at him. "Talk to me."

"Why?" I asked, looking at him.

"Because I have noticed you have stopped."

He watched a tear come down my cheek.

"I need to get ready for work."

He let me go. I walked quickly away to the bedroom wiping tears. Grissom sat on a stool after turning off the boiling soup on the stove. I came out dressed looking at him as I passed to get my soup. I ate some in a bowl looking at him leaning against the counter.

"When do you go?" I asked

"A few hours." He said

"Call me when you get there."

"I will." He said, looking at me. "Sara….I."

"I have to go." I said, putting the half-eaten bowl in the sink. I ran around the island kissing him then I ran out the door. I closed the door sliding down holding my head. Grissom watched the door close in silence.

When I got to work all I could think about was him. I came home after a long shift finding he had gone without a note. I tossed and turned in bed giving up. At work I walked around like a zombie. My phone went off as I was working. I knew who it was. Catherine walked in seeing me.

"Are you going to answer that?" She asked

"No." I said

At home I picked at the TV remote as my phone rang again. I picked it up seeing it was him. My fingers let go of the phone letting it fall to the couch. I rubbed my head as it continued to ring. Catherine walked into the break room seeing that I was slumped of the round table in the corner with papers scattered all around me. She sighed standing next to me looking at the crime scene photos and the neat diagrams I made. Her hand went to my arm causing me to jump sitting up.

"You okay?" She asked

"Yeah." I said, rubbing my face.

"Grissom called and wanted to know if you were all right. Apparently you haven't been talking to him."

I looked down at the papers below me.

"I can't talk to him right now."

She took a seat beside me.

"Are you and Grissom having problems?"

"He moved out of the country. I think you can conclude that we are."

"Why did he really move?"

I looked at her.

"He said he was tired and wanted to do research. I felt angry because it seemed he was doing what he always does. He made this decision all by himself never noticing that I might object to it."

"Did you tell him that?"

"We did talk, but then he asked me if I wanted him to be happy and I couldn't say no."

She watched me lean my head against my hand looking down.

"I don't want to stand in his way, but he should realize that I am in this marriage thing to. I feel left behind."

"You need to talk to him about this."

"No, I can't."

"Sara."

I got up getting the papers.

"I can't."

She watched me leave quickly. My phone rang again and again. I ignored it over and over. A few weeks later I noticed Catherine was acting as if something where going on. She would not say, but I knew it was bad. I walked down the hallway to the locker room stopping to look back as I felt someone following me. No one was there so I began to walk again stopping to look again. When I was satisfied no one was behind me I turned running straight into Grissom. He looked really angry in a black suit with a visitor tag on my pocket.

"Is it really you?" I asked, excited.

"Why have you not been answering my calls?" He asked

"I…meant to."

"No you didn't." He said, shaking his head.

I looked around then at him.

"Can we talk about this in private?"

He yanked me into the locker room.

"Explain!"

"I didn't want to talk to you." I said, leaning against the lockers.

"Why?" He asked, as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Because I am mad at you." I said

"I don't care if you are or not. You call and tell me you are all right!"

"How is Paris?" I asked

"Don't change the subject! I am furious with you!"

"Have you met any women there? Did you flirt with them?"

He stared at me in silence.

"Did you kiss them and take them back to your place?"

"Stop it!"

"I bet there are women there that have distracted you."

He grabbed me pushing me against the lockers.

"I said stop it!"

He leaned in kissing me. I felt a hunger in him. He grabbed at my lips smacking his against them. It became obvious that someone could walk in and see us at any time. I stopped the kiss breathing in and out fast as he did the same. He moved in again, but I stopped him.

"We…can't…do this….here!" I said

"Home?" He said

I shook my head.

"I'm still working."

He seemed to get an idea taking my hand leading me out in the hallway. I let go of his hand letting him touch my back instead. We ended up at the rest area where people rested in between work. He opened the door looking in then he pulled me in. He shut the door behind me leading me along the bunk beds till be got to the last one. With a pull of my hand I bumped into his chest feeling his lips hit mine again. My heart started to race as he started to undo his clothes. He pulled my things off quickly pulling back the blankets. I got in feeling him climb over me pulling the blankets back up.

We lay beside each other in the bed minutes later. Tired from the events that transpired. He kissed me slowly then put his head back on his arm looking at me as he ran his hand over my cheek. I had my hand on his cheek staring in to his eyes.

"I'm sorry." I said "For everything."

"Me to. I still have a lot to learn about relationships."

"Tell me about Paris." I said, gently.

"There's not much to tell. The place I am living is very old and has a lot of history. I go to the courtyard to read. My neighbors keep to themselves except there is a young lady that likes to take her clothes off in front of her bedroom window at six."

I kicked his leg watching him chuckle.

"She better not be when I get there." I said

"I'll keep the curtain closed." He said

I kissed him then laid back.

"When do you leave?"

"I can stay a few days."

I looked at my watch on my wrist.

"Time to go home." I said

"Want to go out to eat?"

"Okay." I said

He kissed me pulled me closer to him. His lips went to my neck.

"I thought we were getting up." I said

"I changed my mind." He said

I smiled watching him move over me again. He snored in my ear later in bed. I smiled missing the feel of him. I was tired when I laid down, but now I was wide awake. My mind was alert with thought about what we did earlier. Grissom moved to his other side and I got up walking quietly out to the back door. I got a cigarette out of my hiding place on the back porch lighting it as I looked up at the moon. Blowing out smoke I closed my eyes enjoying the moment.

I came back to bed laying down feeling like I could sleep. Grissom moved to his back.

"You smell like smoke." He mumbled

"Sorry." I said

He touched my back.

"You need to stop that."

"I have."

"Where are they?" He asked

"Sleep time." I said

"We'll discuss it later."

"Fine." I said

He moved to his side again sighing. The next day I came out ready for work again. Grissom laid out food then we ate.

"That was good." I said

He stood pulling me to him.

"Where are they?"

"Grissom, I don't do it all the time. When I can't sleep I…."

"Which is all the time."

"No, not all the time."

He looked around the room then at me.

"I just smoke when I am wide awake. It relaxes me."

"Drink some tea. Where are they?"

"I have to go to work."

I kissed him then I went to the door.

"What are you doing today?"

"I think stay around here." He said

"Have fun." I said

"Becareful." He said, looking at me.

He watched me leave then he went around the room searching for my pack of cigarettes. Greg hit me as we walked up a hill to where Brass stood. He held out his hand for Greg and then me.

"What is going on?" Greg asked

There were bomb squad people working at the crime scene.

"We found some explosives." Brass said

"Pipe bombs?" I asked

"Yes." He said

I watched them remove a box from the back seat taking it up the hill.

"There is a man in the car. He's been shot in the head."

"Perhaps he was waiting for someone to buy the bombs and it went wrong." Greg said

"Sounds plausible." Brass said

I shivered a little looking around. Brass touched my arm looking at me.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, just cold."

He nodded letting me go to look over at the men at the car. One of the shouted causing the other's to go around to the other side. They looked down somewhere causing us to look at one another. A man walked over to us from the car.

"We need everyone here to go down the hill and wait." He said "We found a live bomb under the driver's seat."

I flinched at the calm at which he said that. Brass looked us moving his head to the side motioning us to go. Greg sighed leading the way as Brass followed behind me. We were halfway down the hillside when a loud boom startled us. A shockwave hit us throwing us down with a force I had never experienced.

Grissom came outside the house after hearing a loud sound. He looked around seeing some neighbors looking around on their porch. He got his phone out calling my phone.

"Were sorry the person you are trying to reach is not available." The woman's voice said on the phone.

Grissom looked worried as he looked around again.

"Sara." He said

I woke seeing little pieces of ash falling down all around me. I blinked slowly seeing another body close by. Heat from somewhere warmed my shaking body.

"Sara?!" A man shouted "Sara?!"

Brass held his head as he ran over to me. He touched my back. The cut on his head was throbbing as he felt a headache starting.

He got out his phone seeing it was broken. Behind him he saw some of the bomb squad crawling up coughing looking singed. Brass stood looking at them.

"What happened?!" He asked

"It was set to go off….when we…touched it." The man said

Greg coughed standing slowly looking around in shock. The sky was lit up from the fire.

"Greg, do you have your phone?!" Brass asked

Greg in his dazed state just stared around him.

"Greg!" Brass shouted

He looked up at the older man.

"Do you have your phone?" He asked

Greg searched digging out the phone in his pocket. Brass ran down grabbing it. Greg watched him dial a number and wait. He looked over seeing Brass's men running up to the scene. I slowly got up on my hands and knees sitting back looking at everything around me hearing Brass talking muffled.

"Sara?" Greg called, walking over kneeling down to me. "Are you okay?"

I looked at his lips trying to decipher what he was saying. Greg said something again then he looked at Brass.

"She can't hear me!"

Brass walked over kneeling down in front of me.

"Sara, I want to check your ears." He said, moving my head to the side seeing there was blood coming out of my ears.

The ambulance came and I was loaded in. Grissom ran into the hospital worried. He came into the room I was in. I sat up in a bed looking at him. He walked over seeing the cotton in my ears. He took my hand. I watched him kiss it then he looked over to the left. I looked over seeing the doctor coming in talking to Grissom.

"Gil Grissom, I am Sara's husband." Grissom said, shaking the man's hand.

"Doctor Wilson." He said

"How is she?"

I looked at Grissom as he looked at me talking.

"She does not have any broken bones. During the blast her ear drums ruptured causing bleeding."

Grissom looked at him knowing how sensitive the ear is.

"What is he saying?" I asked, louder than normal.

"Will she get her hearing back?"

"It should be temporary, but with her proximity to the blast it may be permanent. We want to keep her here for a day."

"All right."

The doctor walked over to me. I watched him scared. He wrote something on a paper on his clip board then he showed it to me. It said he was going to check my ears. I looked at Grissom as the doctor took out the cotton ball. He put something in my ear and I cried out winching.

"This one is blocked with blood and pus." The doctor said

He came around to my other side checking my ear.

"I will have a nurse clean this out and then I'll come back checking her ear again."

He went out leaving us. Grissom sat on the bed looking at me. He kissed my hand. I looked down feeling him tap my arm. I looked at him seeing he was trying to talk to me.

"You are going to be all right." He said, slowly.

I squinted my eyes at his lips trying to read them. He put a finger up to say wait a minute. Getting up he walked to the door leaving a second before coming back with a notepad and pen. He sat down again writing on it. I took it seeing his words.

"You're going to be all right."

I took the pen from him.

"I can't hear!" I wrote

"It is only temporary."

I nodded not knowing if it was or not. Grissom brought me home the next day after the Doctor argued with me about leaving. Grissom was against it to, but I was stubborn. I laid back on the couch as he walked over. He sat down beside me touching my knee. We looked at each other in silence then I moved over hugging him. He kissed my head letting me lay against his chest. He smoothed my hair as he looked at the wall. I lifted my head looking at him.

"Are you all right?" I asked, loudly.

He nodded searching my face.

"Are….you… all…right?" He asked, slowly poking my chest.

"Yes." I said

"Do…you…want….something…..to….eat?" He asked

I stared at his lips shaking my head. I laid back against his chest sighing feeling tired. Grissom kissed my head again taking a breath as he leaned his head against mine. I closed my eyes letting his heartbeat lull me into sleep.

Grissom sat at his desk with his eyes closed trying to listen to different sounds in the building. Brass walked in looking at Grissom as he opened his eyes seeing his friend.

"Sorry to wake you." Brass said, with a smile.

"I was listening to the sounds of the building."

"In other words you are worried about Sara." He said

"I am." Grissom said "I am worried that this is going to be permanent and she will have to learn to live with being deaf."

"I couldn't do it." Brass said

"I don't think she can either. She sits around the house doing nothing. I come home and see that she is depressed."

"What did the doctor say?"

Grissom sighed sitting back in his seat.

"He still tells me it is temporary."

"Well then maybe it is."

Grissom nodded looking sad. He came home seeing me walking over to him with a look of shock on my face.

"Sara, what's wrong?" He asked, pulling me to him.

"Gris, I think I can hear again!"

"Really?" He asked

I nodded.

"How did this happen?" He asked

"I was sitting on the couch and my ears started to ring then I could hear the neighbor's dog."

"Oh Sara!" He said, pulling me to him. I laughed against his shoulder.

That night I watched him as he slept beside me thinking how lucky I was to have him. He was so relaxed without his usual troubled dreams that plagued him at times. I reached over tracing his face with my fingers. He moved clearing his throat then he stilled. I smiled touching his face again this time he did open his eyes looking at me.

"Something wrong dear?" He asked, gently.

"You are very handsome." I said

He smiled moving his head closer to me.

"Am I?"

"I think so."

He took my hand caressing my fingers.

"You know sometimes I am amazed that you are in bed with me."

"A few years ago it would have scared you." I said

"What can we do to get you to sleep?"

"I like looking at you." I said

"You need to rest."

"Well, you could hold me."

He thought a moment then he pulled me over to him letting me lay my head on his chest.

"Now just close your eyes and sleep." He said

I laid there feeling his chest move up and down slowly. Lifting my body up I sat over him as he opened his eyes looking up at me.

"I know something that would put me to sleep."

"I could read to you."

"No." I said, leaning down kissing him. He rolled us over so I was on the bottom. He moved back looking down at me.

"You promise after this you will go to sleep?"

"Definitely." I said, smiling.

"All right." He said

I kissed him with passion as he pulled me closer.


End file.
